Your Distractions Are Defining Your Life

We are officially in the age of modern distractions.
Reading time: 15 minutes

Social media, pornography, drugs, hate, motivational videos… wasn’t sure if to put this one too.

Life slips away from our hands every time we let them win.

It is not an equal fight.

There are so many of those out there, but only here only we.

A single person needs to deal with all of that.

I am sorry. We didn’t get a chance to sign up for everything that this world has to offer and now we have to deal with it. But didn’t we? We get to choose every day.

So why not change? Why it’s so pleasurable?

In today’s letter, you will embrace your insecurities, work on your distractions in applicable ways, find sources that will help you fight this unequal battle, and embrace the new version you are becoming. So let’s dive into the world of distractions.

Everything Everywhere At Once

That was a great movie. Didn’t understand much, but my short attention span brain liked it.

So, a lot is happening around you.

I can guess that the inside is a mess as well. I got the same thing. Don’t you worry?

What is a distraction?

A distraction can be described as a cognitive interference or interruption in one's focused attention, which diverts mental resources away from the primary task or goal, often resulting in reduced performance or increased errors due to the intrusion of unrelated stimuli or thoughts.

Easier?

Imagine being a small child playing with your toys, but then your little brother or sister comes into your room and starts talking to you about their stuffed animal. And then going to play with their toys starts to be more enjoyable. Distractions can be like those sneaky giggles that want to steal your attention from your awesome games.

Now more applicable.

You are studying for an important subject in college or doing your business assignment because you were procrastinating till the last moment. Then. Suddenly. A bird flies and it tweets. Do you know what also tweets? People on twee… ahh darn it. You know. Scrolling through all the memes in the world and short videos on social media. That is a distraction.

Whenever something gets to take hostage of your attention and as a result, you feel bad, because you didn’t get to finish the work you find more valuable than these distractions.

This way of living can make your life miserable.

It already does.

Doom scrolling for a few hours a day.

Watching pornography.

Doing substances to elevate your mood.

This is what is changing the way you feel about yourself.

Your brain chemistry is in shambles.

Only cutting those things off completely at some times can save whatever is left.

And it’s hard.

You know that you shouldn’t consume so much content without value, but anyway you do. It’s designed to give so much pleasure. Those creators and website designers know everything about the short attention span people developed over the last few years and the little pleasure-seeking brains we have.

This is so much primal.

Our ancestors had to contend with immediate and tangible distractions essential for their survival.

It means, predatory threats, searching for food, and basic shelter needs require their constant attention. Plenty of things to deal with, but they had to wrap their minds around so much.

Those distractions were grounded in primal instincts and the fundamental drive to ensure survival.

The dopamine-driven reward system dwells on notifications tapping into our primal brain chemistry. In the primal days, the joy of finding sustenance of the thrill of avoiding real danger - what means, running from the struggles we have as well today.

Every time you tap yourself out of whatever you do.

How to get out of this state?

1. Set Strong Goals:

Define your priorities and focus on what truly matters to you.

Don’t listen to what other people say about your life, but what you truly want to achieve.

Only then it will be so much influencing the way you think that you will want to have this change after you.

2. Create the Schedule:

Establish a structured daily routine to allocate time for focused work and leisure.

Step by step.

You know how much time you can waste doing everything at once.

A lot.

Maybe it can work for you: setting morning and night routines, going to the everyday, self-care, daily reading and writing, content creation, business… step by step.

The mountains are not achieved in one day. If you have a strong goal, set smaller goals and achieve them in your daily schedule.

3. Throw Your Phone Away:

Reducing the screen time won’t help.

If you can use your phone already for only 1-2 hours a day you don’t need to create content. You can be saved by doing so.

In case you are using your phone excessively checking out all your social media every 5 seconds, writing to friends because you are bored, or checking out people/random information on the internet all day. Get yourself out of your phone.

Period.

Purchase a Forest app, give it to your friend, and put it in the drawer of your friend’s desk who lives on another continent in another universe.

Get it out of your face and you will see change. Day, two, a week. The brain chemistry changes in that time.

4. Notifications Off:

WHY DO YOU NEED ALL OF THESE NOTIFICATIONS?

Turn them off.

Only for important emails, you get (if you get any), messages in case of emergency and direct contact.

You don’t need to have all the social media, Reddit, web browser, news, or whatever… in your notification box. Why?!

5. One project at a time:

All your daily tasks. Treat them as a project.

You are the CEO of your own company called “My Life” and you want it to prosper.

Act like one to see the change happening.

Have your schedule.

Choose simple projects to do and get into the flow of work.

Then choose something more complicated.

Don’t put yourself out there with something nearly impossible and have an opportunity to complain about how everything is hard and against you.

Do one at a time and have some fun with it.

And take rests without meaningless distractions.

6. Organize Your Phone:

On my phone I have all the apps sorted and categorized by the way I am using them like

Utilities, Photo & Video, Finance, Shopping, Productivity, Travel, and two apps: Google Tasks to quickly put a task if it comes to my head and Messenger to communicate.

But that last one I will probably delete that soon if I get an idea of what to put there instead.

Have apps with designated goals and it will work this way. Don’t use something when you don’t need to use it.

7. Designated Workspace:

Create a distraction-free workspace for working and studying.

My workspace is my temple (aside from my body).

I open it only when I work and never in other cases.

The same thing as it comes to the bed. Only for sleeping and sex.

Not being on the phone scrolling or even reading a book.

Make a space with which you will associate certain traits you have such as being focused and creative instead of mixing it all up.

Even with ADHD, it’s going to be hard to catch up with all of that.

8. Become More Mindful:

Watch videos.

Read books.

Speak with people.

Become who you are not by doing things you didn’t do.

Practice.

It’s a real skill acquisition to get yourself to be focused at certain times and forget about all the distractions available within reach of your hands.

Make yourself master of your mind and body and nothing will ever hurt you.

9. Prioritize Self-Care:

Ensure you get enough rest, exercise, and relaxation to reduce stress and mental clutter.

Whatever is in your head right now is a result of your intake.

Media, hobbies, school, work, people, everything here impacts the way that it all works within you.

Start mental decluttering by taking care of yourself.

Go to the gym 4 times a week, if not go for a long walk or go for a run more often.

Work on breathing relaxation.

Drink at least a gallon of water a day (3-4 liters).

Get the sun on your skin and eyes.

Wear some nice clothes.

Speak up when you fear.

Get your confidence working and everything will follow.

That’s it.

Work on yourself and give some rest to your body and mind of yours.

Sometimes it’s all that it truly needs.

10. Tell It Out Loud:

Share your goal with a friend, or a family member.

If you get this thing out there in the world, something starts clicking.

Maybe not right away. But maybe?

You start to realize that people are out there to help you.

Or at least that they understand you, because they are going through the same thing now or someday.

It’s not only YOU thing.

Each of us went or is going through this addiction at some point, or if you are the flower who was spared when we were getting infected by this virus - feel lucky. It’s not an easy battle.

It’s time to summarize it.

Distractions are an inherent part of human life.

Don’t feel bad that you get distracted.

It’s part of us.

Try to do your best and remember to never give up on this journey, because it’s worth it.

Don’t feel bad about getting distracted now and then. It’s okay. As long as you still have your goals set and you know that even by making this “mistake” you are going to make it through because you are a strong person who learns all the time.

We are not perfect. We will never be.

But there is something that distinguishes us from all the primal people before us.

In our hands, we hold the device to do wonders no one ever thought that was possible.

We have access to all the information to make this life a better journey.

Let’s make a solid decision right now.

I will make it work.

I will fail.

Because I am just a human, and nothing is diminishing about it.

I will learn from all that I do getting wiser every day.

I will not give up no matter what the struggle I will face.

I become stronger and in the state of becoming stronger each moment, I will stay.

This process of evolving can be frustrating.

We may not see progress for a long time, just because we focus on one day of being.

Anyway, there is a hell of the work that you already put into all of it.

So I am happy.

Keep it up and keep on crushing it at your tempo without comparing yourself to anyone else. This is distracting by itself. Don’t let yourself be deluded by hatred toward others and focus mentally on yourself because only then you can be better for others. It’s not selfish.

And now the best part…

It’s all about boredom, resistance, and clarity.

You are bored.

Accordingly, why do you get distracted?

Boredom means doing things we don’t understand the goal of doing.

That’s why you get so much resistance when you have to do your work.

It’s not like you don’t have a goal.

The issue is the lack of a clear and meaningful connection to those goals.

You want to get in shape so you will go to the gym 4x times a week with a schedule.

You know what to do.

But it is hard to even start it.

For this reason, you need to understand how resistance pops up in your life and ways to pursue yourself to do what you need.

What is resistance?

It’s a feeling or a thought inside of you that tells you that something is not worth the effort you have to put in now.

You need to decide what are the pros of your goal.

If you want to achieve something because you understand within you that this will allow you to lead a better life or it’s just because someone told you that you have to do it.

I felt this way in school.

Getting assignments and learning about history, and physics and going to PE lessons just to sit on a bench, because we didn’t have anything interesting.

I didn’t like these times. But I started owning them. I put myself into action, by understanding that except learning actual stuff and getting better scores I will teach myself how to study. And this is a skill that will help lead a better future.

I was doing something that I didn’t like, because I didn’t have a goal to do but I reframed the whole picture and started enjoying it. I treated it as a challenge to make it more enjoyable and have some fun.

You are a player in this game of life.

So make it your favorite video game where you acquire skills and do tasks that will get you closer to the infinite state of becoming better and better with each second.

Make it a game and it will start working out eventually.

You will gain clarity.

Most of us have no clue what to do.

That’s true. We don’t know what goals to set and even though we can have them we are scared to pursue them because the result can threaten our identity. The identity of being impeccable.

By dissolving this identity threat by making mistakes each day and by gaining trust in ourselves we are acquiring clarity of who we are and what we want.

That is a breaking point.

We can either live the whole life in comfort doing the things that we know, but we don’t like them though we know the outcome it give us.

Or set sails on the unknown waters not distracting ourselves with cheap pleasures and get what we need to build the version of ourselves we want to be in hold of.

Don’t compare yourself and evolve.

The ideal way is to compare yourself only to the last version of yourself.

But how the hell do you have to now, what more can you achieve?

If you need to compare yourself, do it.

If you don’t find motivation in it, cut it off immediately. You will get to the point that looking at other successful people will only make you inspired and your identity won’t be threatened.

Getting yourself out of a rut is a journey.

You may have people close to you that will join but as well these that will stay and do nothing about it.

Dream of life without distractions. You are hitting the marks and living to the fullest.

You are so overthinking: I will be better than this and this person, because of it.

I am better than myself from yesterday or from minutes ago.

I am evolving into something I always wanted to be.

Don’t get hatred to get to you.

Let others talk behind your back that you are becoming strange to them.

They won’t understand the ambition that is beaming inside of you, not to live in mutilating pleasure. You are ready to struggle and cut everything that stops you from achieving it.

It is a good place. Even by thinking about it, seriously you need to start acting like you care about the change.

Summarizing.

Have some fun during this life-lasting process.

It’s worth everything to be in the state that there is only true you living the life you create for yourself without getting distracted.

Assess the value and cut off what only disrupts your state of becoming

See you in the next one.

Keep that smile. It’s going to work out.

— Jakub Sznajder, but you can call me Jacob